Real-life Fear and Loathing bores travellers trying to find the American Dream
Two men attempting to recreate the drug-induced, wildly insane trip to Las Vegas decribed in the movie Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas were disappointed with the results and are trying to get their life back together now that the trip is over.
Matt Jarvis and Rudy McGraw, both 28 year-old lawyers from Scranton, Pennsylvania, quit their high-profile careers last August to drive to Las Vegas in search for the American Dream, as the late Hunter S. Thompson described it in the original book.
The men rented a red convertable and obtained a quantity of drugs totalling approximately $6,000, including ether, blotter acid, and a salt-shaker half full of cocaine. They then proceeded to Vegas, where they had a hotel suite booked at the Mint.
In the middle of the desert, they stopped to pick up a hitchhiker, just like the characters in the movie had done. But instead of the incident ending in a terrified kid running for the cops, it turned out that Jarvis and McGraw had alot in common with the young traveller and ended up getting along well with him. He even agreed to continue with them on their trip, claiming that he, too, was looking for the American Dream.
Once arriving at the hotel, they prepared themselves for a hilariously sticky situation regarding their reservations. But instead of the hotel representative turning into a giant lizard, she remained friendly and calm throughout the check-in process.
“We were expecting some really heavy shit, and I even wore golf shoes for when the lizards in the bar started tearing each other apart,” Jarvis said. “In the movie, Johnny Depp says they needed golf shoes to get out of the bar alive, so we made sure we had them.
“The problem, I think, was that we forgot to take the acid until we were right outside Vegas, so the drugs hadn't kicked in yet,” he continued.
After checking in, the men went to their room to wait for things to get really crazy. But it never happened. They ended up ordering room service - unlike the movie, they ordered a conservative meal of bacon and eggs, with no grapefruit and no machete - and waited for the drugs to kick in.
But before they did, McGraw had fallen asleep. So instead, Jarvis went down to the hotel casino and gambled for an hour or so. When he returned to the room after losing a small amount of money, having one or two drinks, and not making any sort of scene at all, McGraw was awake and feeling fine. Not great or terrible, just a mediocre feeling.
After showering and changing into clean clothes, they went back to the casino to find anyone registered with any sort of convention. But instead of stumbling upon a room full of State of Nevada police officers, they discovered the convention that weekend was the Ladies of Vermont Sewing Circle Convention.
“There were grandmothers everywhere, and not even one of them looked shady or unsavoury at all,” McGraw said. “In fact, they were very nice women. They even invited us for tea.”
Continued on page 5
Disclaimer: Stories printed in the Fanshawe Distorter are in fact fictious. Any resemblance to persons real or dead is unintentional and entirely hilarious. Proudly distorting the truth since 2005.
Matt Jarvis and Rudy McGraw, both 28 year-old lawyers from Scranton, Pennsylvania, quit their high-profile careers last August to drive to Las Vegas in search for the American Dream, as the late Hunter S. Thompson described it in the original book.
The men rented a red convertable and obtained a quantity of drugs totalling approximately $6,000, including ether, blotter acid, and a salt-shaker half full of cocaine. They then proceeded to Vegas, where they had a hotel suite booked at the Mint.
In the middle of the desert, they stopped to pick up a hitchhiker, just like the characters in the movie had done. But instead of the incident ending in a terrified kid running for the cops, it turned out that Jarvis and McGraw had alot in common with the young traveller and ended up getting along well with him. He even agreed to continue with them on their trip, claiming that he, too, was looking for the American Dream.
Once arriving at the hotel, they prepared themselves for a hilariously sticky situation regarding their reservations. But instead of the hotel representative turning into a giant lizard, she remained friendly and calm throughout the check-in process.
“We were expecting some really heavy shit, and I even wore golf shoes for when the lizards in the bar started tearing each other apart,” Jarvis said. “In the movie, Johnny Depp says they needed golf shoes to get out of the bar alive, so we made sure we had them.
“The problem, I think, was that we forgot to take the acid until we were right outside Vegas, so the drugs hadn't kicked in yet,” he continued.
After checking in, the men went to their room to wait for things to get really crazy. But it never happened. They ended up ordering room service - unlike the movie, they ordered a conservative meal of bacon and eggs, with no grapefruit and no machete - and waited for the drugs to kick in.
But before they did, McGraw had fallen asleep. So instead, Jarvis went down to the hotel casino and gambled for an hour or so. When he returned to the room after losing a small amount of money, having one or two drinks, and not making any sort of scene at all, McGraw was awake and feeling fine. Not great or terrible, just a mediocre feeling.
After showering and changing into clean clothes, they went back to the casino to find anyone registered with any sort of convention. But instead of stumbling upon a room full of State of Nevada police officers, they discovered the convention that weekend was the Ladies of Vermont Sewing Circle Convention.
“There were grandmothers everywhere, and not even one of them looked shady or unsavoury at all,” McGraw said. “In fact, they were very nice women. They even invited us for tea.”
Continued on page 5
Disclaimer: Stories printed in the Fanshawe Distorter are in fact fictious. Any resemblance to persons real or dead is unintentional and entirely hilarious. Proudly distorting the truth since 2005.
