What can men do to get what they want in the sack?
I found a November 23 Interrobang issue 14 opinion piece titled “How to get everything you want and need in the bedroom” by Ivana Pelisek a little biased. Not a single mention of how men can get what they want in bed! But you can't blame the author, she doesn't understand how our intensely abstract man-brains function. Her advice to “learn your body” doesn't really apply to guys, who have been “learning their bodies” since they were 12.
So how does a guy get what he wants in bed? Here's a huge tip: Try repeating, “come on,” over and over until your partner reluctantly gives in. Add a bit of a whiney tone to your voice and pout a little. If it doesn't work the first five times, don't let up; she's testing your commitment.
But all jokes aside, that only works about 10 per cent of the time. Even then, if she isn't in the mood, it's not happening. Which really begs the question: Do guys really get what they want in bed, or do women allow them to have it?
That's the real puzzle. And what's the reality? Well… let's face it; if she's not comfortable she'll shut you down like a food inspector. They have that power.
I think we're trapped guys, we're just going to have to keep them happy. It's the only way to get what we want. We have to be selfless if we want to be selfish.
How do we keep them happy? We can't just throw money at them. Actually, don't throw money at them at all, apparently they find that incredibly insulting.
You'll have to resort to being what they used to call a “gentleman;” a term from the dark ages used to describe a well-mannered and considerate man with high standards of proper behaviour.
So take her out, make her laugh, and try not to make an ass of yourself… that's where most of us fall short. It helps if you remember her name as well. But above all else, be respectful and realize that in the end we both just want a fun and memorable connection.
Editorial opinions or comments expressed in this online edition of Interrobang newspaper reflect the views of the writer and are not those of the Interrobang or the Fanshawe Student Union. The Interrobang is published weekly by the Fanshawe Student Union at 1001 Fanshawe College Blvd., P.O. Box 7005, London, Ontario, N5Y 5R6 and distributed through the Fanshawe College community. Letters to the editor are welcome. All letters are subject to editing and should be emailed. All letters must be accompanied by contact information. Letters can also be submitted online by clicking here.
So how does a guy get what he wants in bed? Here's a huge tip: Try repeating, “come on,” over and over until your partner reluctantly gives in. Add a bit of a whiney tone to your voice and pout a little. If it doesn't work the first five times, don't let up; she's testing your commitment.
But all jokes aside, that only works about 10 per cent of the time. Even then, if she isn't in the mood, it's not happening. Which really begs the question: Do guys really get what they want in bed, or do women allow them to have it?
That's the real puzzle. And what's the reality? Well… let's face it; if she's not comfortable she'll shut you down like a food inspector. They have that power.
I think we're trapped guys, we're just going to have to keep them happy. It's the only way to get what we want. We have to be selfless if we want to be selfish.
How do we keep them happy? We can't just throw money at them. Actually, don't throw money at them at all, apparently they find that incredibly insulting.
You'll have to resort to being what they used to call a “gentleman;” a term from the dark ages used to describe a well-mannered and considerate man with high standards of proper behaviour.
So take her out, make her laugh, and try not to make an ass of yourself… that's where most of us fall short. It helps if you remember her name as well. But above all else, be respectful and realize that in the end we both just want a fun and memorable connection.
Editorial opinions or comments expressed in this online edition of Interrobang newspaper reflect the views of the writer and are not those of the Interrobang or the Fanshawe Student Union. The Interrobang is published weekly by the Fanshawe Student Union at 1001 Fanshawe College Blvd., P.O. Box 7005, London, Ontario, N5Y 5R6 and distributed through the Fanshawe College community. Letters to the editor are welcome. All letters are subject to editing and should be emailed. All letters must be accompanied by contact information. Letters can also be submitted online by clicking here.
