Smokey Bear is main suspect in Algonquin Park blaze
A raging fire broke out in Algonquin Park last Wednesday, and local firefighters and police investigators are holding an unusual suspect in custody.
Anti-fire icon Smokey Bear was picked up outside his waterfront cave just outside the park early Thursday morning after police found evidence implicating Smokey at the burn site.
Among the items found were a large Ranger hat with the name Smokey embellished on it, much like the one Smokey is wearing in all of his photos. Investigators also uncovered an unusually large pair of blue jeans. They had been severely damaged by the fire, but traces of thick brown fur were found.
Residents of nearby towns, MNR workers and firefighters are all baffled by the act, and are finding it hard to believe that the blaze was started by Smokey.
“You think you know someone, and then they go and do something totally out of character like this,” said Algonquin Park Fire Chief Randy Chesley. “Smokey has been a close friend of mine for years, and I never saw it coming.”
The fire destroyed three hundred acres of protected forests in the National Park, where each year thousands of outdoor adventurers flock to hike, fish and camp in the pristine wilderness. There have been many fires before, but none that have so deeply shaken the community.
Smokey's lawyer, Clifford Reed, has released an official statement that declares Smokey's innocence, and hints at an elaborate setup.
“We aren't sure yet who would do this terrible thing to such a well-loved advocate of fire safety,” the statement read. “Whoever has tried to tarnish Smokey's good name in such a hainous way will be found, and punished to the full extent of the law.”
Prior to his arrest last week, Smokey has a virtually pristine past, with no criminal record.
However, there are rumours circulating around Fire Station No. 12 that Smokey Bear is an assumed name, and that the suspect's real identity remains a secret. Some are speculating that this is due to a shady past, shrouded in arson charges.
Police have not pressed any formal charges against Smokey, but are keeping him in custody for 48 hours while prosecutors scramble to obtain a warrant to search Smokey's cave for incriminating evidence such as matches or lighters, gasoline and gas-soaked clothing.
Reporters and photographers bombarded the old bear as he was escorted into the police station. Moving quickly, Smokey stopped only briefly to shout, “Only you can prevent forest fires!”
Supporters who had gathered with signs and banners to protest the arrest erupted in a unanimous cheer for Smokey when he delivered his famous catchphrase.
Smokey will be arraigned at the Algonquin Court House as soon as fishing season is over. He could face trial as early as the 2005-2006 hunting season.
Disclaimer: Stories printed in the Fanshawe Distorter are in fact fictious. Any resemblance to persons real or dead is unintentional and entirely hilarious.
Anti-fire icon Smokey Bear was picked up outside his waterfront cave just outside the park early Thursday morning after police found evidence implicating Smokey at the burn site.
Among the items found were a large Ranger hat with the name Smokey embellished on it, much like the one Smokey is wearing in all of his photos. Investigators also uncovered an unusually large pair of blue jeans. They had been severely damaged by the fire, but traces of thick brown fur were found.
Residents of nearby towns, MNR workers and firefighters are all baffled by the act, and are finding it hard to believe that the blaze was started by Smokey.
“You think you know someone, and then they go and do something totally out of character like this,” said Algonquin Park Fire Chief Randy Chesley. “Smokey has been a close friend of mine for years, and I never saw it coming.”
The fire destroyed three hundred acres of protected forests in the National Park, where each year thousands of outdoor adventurers flock to hike, fish and camp in the pristine wilderness. There have been many fires before, but none that have so deeply shaken the community.
Smokey's lawyer, Clifford Reed, has released an official statement that declares Smokey's innocence, and hints at an elaborate setup.
“We aren't sure yet who would do this terrible thing to such a well-loved advocate of fire safety,” the statement read. “Whoever has tried to tarnish Smokey's good name in such a hainous way will be found, and punished to the full extent of the law.”
Prior to his arrest last week, Smokey has a virtually pristine past, with no criminal record.
However, there are rumours circulating around Fire Station No. 12 that Smokey Bear is an assumed name, and that the suspect's real identity remains a secret. Some are speculating that this is due to a shady past, shrouded in arson charges.
Police have not pressed any formal charges against Smokey, but are keeping him in custody for 48 hours while prosecutors scramble to obtain a warrant to search Smokey's cave for incriminating evidence such as matches or lighters, gasoline and gas-soaked clothing.
Reporters and photographers bombarded the old bear as he was escorted into the police station. Moving quickly, Smokey stopped only briefly to shout, “Only you can prevent forest fires!”
Supporters who had gathered with signs and banners to protest the arrest erupted in a unanimous cheer for Smokey when he delivered his famous catchphrase.
Smokey will be arraigned at the Algonquin Court House as soon as fishing season is over. He could face trial as early as the 2005-2006 hunting season.
Disclaimer: Stories printed in the Fanshawe Distorter are in fact fictious. Any resemblance to persons real or dead is unintentional and entirely hilarious.
