Find the way back to your heart through self-expression
“Keep your heart with all diligence; for
out of it are the issues of life” is a Psalmist
quote that expresses conviction to believe in
our own self and not act on false pretence.
With our communication skills and big brains, humans are more often known to be dissemblers. We fake interest in the hobbies of our friends to fit in to their social circle. We capitulate to the demands of our bosses without putting forth our honest judgements. Today, success is conceived to be a function of personality, public image, attitudes and behaviours, tactics and techniques that focus on lubricating the processes of human interaction. We assume to be fooling others but in the long run, we will be fooling ourselves. The evidence of devastating consequences for this sort of self-deception can be found in the history of world wars, stock market collapses and dissolution of marriages. Your character about who you are overrides the personality you try to create.
Even though these quick fixes may solve problems temporarily, the root causes of the problems are not paid attention to, and these underlying chronic problems fester and resurface again. For example, parents try to get social mileage out of their children's good behaviour and therefore, measure their expectations. The image of their role as good and caring parents would be even deeper than the image of their own son. Their own feelings of worth should not be dependent on their children's acceptable behaviour. Such social comparison makes way for conditional love and eventually lessens the child's sense of self-worth. Imposing your own beliefs on your child won't help, as each child is unique and realizes potential at his own pace and speed. The best thing would be to stand apart and separate themselves from his identity, individuality and worth; his parents need to naturally affirm, value and enjoy him.
Expressing yourself and being completely open about who you are and what you want are incredibly important. When you hide, eventually, you are going to slip up and it's inevitable. There is a saying by the famous Dr. Seuss, “Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.” Those closest to you accept and love you exactly the way you are.
People push back their feelings to preserve dignity, due to some social stigma or a sense of shame. Some may want to protect themselves from intense desires and fears. However, stifling emotions can cause ill health and even mental breakdown. Some therapists report that negative thoughts can lead to cancer. Stress caused by repression releases a brain chemical called cortisol, which has the power to damage your body. We are bound to feel emotionally constipated, too.
We creatively express our inner self in almost everything we do, whether it's in the form of dance, music, writing, theatre, painting or something else entirely. Our imagination, daydreams and fantasies are also a creative form of self-expression. Fantasies, when tempered with reality, turn into goals we strive toward in life.
At the time of expressing ourselves, we tend to sublimate the libidinal energy, which according to Sigmund Freud, is the basis of all biological fuels that drive us. For a long time, we failed to sublimate this energy into creative expression. Today, more people are willing to do so. Self-expression bridges the gap between our real and fantasized self and kicks frustration away. It makes us more complete and fulfills us spiritually.
By giving real expression to the bits of our inner self, we get into a state of consistent bliss. Now, the mental state from which you face your daily tasks and even critical business decisions is more of a consolidated and tranquil one. You stay in the present moment and perceive your circumstances more realistically. The brain moves into a meditative state in which we act calm and synchronize our actions better. Sharing our feelings in the times of joy and sorrow with people not only beats stress and frees our mind but also makes our life more meaningful.
There are certainly moments when you need to withhold feelings, for example anger management. We definitely need to exercise care or caution before speaking to some people so that we don't hurt the other person. But self-expression and being assertive prevents us from bottling up emotions that can lead to rage. Also, as far as realistically possible, we should understand the value of speaking our heart out and being sincere. Eventually, in long-term relationships, duplicity and lack of deep integrity will only breed distrust. Therefore, it is important to sow the seeds of self-expression from a young age in order to reap its fruits later.
Editorial opinions or comments expressed in this online edition of Interrobang newspaper reflect the views of the writer and are not those of the Interrobang or the Fanshawe Student Union. The Interrobang is published weekly by the Fanshawe Student Union at 1001 Fanshawe College Blvd., P.O. Box 7005, London, Ontario, N5Y 5R6 and distributed through the Fanshawe College community. Letters to the editor are welcome. All letters are subject to editing and should be emailed. All letters must be accompanied by contact information. Letters can also be submitted online by clicking here.
With our communication skills and big brains, humans are more often known to be dissemblers. We fake interest in the hobbies of our friends to fit in to their social circle. We capitulate to the demands of our bosses without putting forth our honest judgements. Today, success is conceived to be a function of personality, public image, attitudes and behaviours, tactics and techniques that focus on lubricating the processes of human interaction. We assume to be fooling others but in the long run, we will be fooling ourselves. The evidence of devastating consequences for this sort of self-deception can be found in the history of world wars, stock market collapses and dissolution of marriages. Your character about who you are overrides the personality you try to create.
Even though these quick fixes may solve problems temporarily, the root causes of the problems are not paid attention to, and these underlying chronic problems fester and resurface again. For example, parents try to get social mileage out of their children's good behaviour and therefore, measure their expectations. The image of their role as good and caring parents would be even deeper than the image of their own son. Their own feelings of worth should not be dependent on their children's acceptable behaviour. Such social comparison makes way for conditional love and eventually lessens the child's sense of self-worth. Imposing your own beliefs on your child won't help, as each child is unique and realizes potential at his own pace and speed. The best thing would be to stand apart and separate themselves from his identity, individuality and worth; his parents need to naturally affirm, value and enjoy him.
Expressing yourself and being completely open about who you are and what you want are incredibly important. When you hide, eventually, you are going to slip up and it's inevitable. There is a saying by the famous Dr. Seuss, “Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.” Those closest to you accept and love you exactly the way you are.
People push back their feelings to preserve dignity, due to some social stigma or a sense of shame. Some may want to protect themselves from intense desires and fears. However, stifling emotions can cause ill health and even mental breakdown. Some therapists report that negative thoughts can lead to cancer. Stress caused by repression releases a brain chemical called cortisol, which has the power to damage your body. We are bound to feel emotionally constipated, too.
We creatively express our inner self in almost everything we do, whether it's in the form of dance, music, writing, theatre, painting or something else entirely. Our imagination, daydreams and fantasies are also a creative form of self-expression. Fantasies, when tempered with reality, turn into goals we strive toward in life.
At the time of expressing ourselves, we tend to sublimate the libidinal energy, which according to Sigmund Freud, is the basis of all biological fuels that drive us. For a long time, we failed to sublimate this energy into creative expression. Today, more people are willing to do so. Self-expression bridges the gap between our real and fantasized self and kicks frustration away. It makes us more complete and fulfills us spiritually.
By giving real expression to the bits of our inner self, we get into a state of consistent bliss. Now, the mental state from which you face your daily tasks and even critical business decisions is more of a consolidated and tranquil one. You stay in the present moment and perceive your circumstances more realistically. The brain moves into a meditative state in which we act calm and synchronize our actions better. Sharing our feelings in the times of joy and sorrow with people not only beats stress and frees our mind but also makes our life more meaningful.
There are certainly moments when you need to withhold feelings, for example anger management. We definitely need to exercise care or caution before speaking to some people so that we don't hurt the other person. But self-expression and being assertive prevents us from bottling up emotions that can lead to rage. Also, as far as realistically possible, we should understand the value of speaking our heart out and being sincere. Eventually, in long-term relationships, duplicity and lack of deep integrity will only breed distrust. Therefore, it is important to sow the seeds of self-expression from a young age in order to reap its fruits later.
Editorial opinions or comments expressed in this online edition of Interrobang newspaper reflect the views of the writer and are not those of the Interrobang or the Fanshawe Student Union. The Interrobang is published weekly by the Fanshawe Student Union at 1001 Fanshawe College Blvd., P.O. Box 7005, London, Ontario, N5Y 5R6 and distributed through the Fanshawe College community. Letters to the editor are welcome. All letters are subject to editing and should be emailed. All letters must be accompanied by contact information. Letters can also be submitted online by clicking here.
