Nine-year-old Thomas Green, left, thought it was cool when a bunch of grade eight kids asked him to pose for a cellphone photograph while sporting his brand new t-shirt that he found in his dad's closet.

“When I grow up, I am going to be just like him!” said the fourth grader. “We have matching lunchboxes too!”

Thomas' father, Bill, explained that he had no idea that his son had gone through his closet that fateful morning.

“I tell him all the time ‘Thomas, you cannot take my clothes unless you ask me first,'” said Green. “But he never listens, and of course he decides to wear THAT particular shirt.”

Mr. Green explained that the shirt was a gift from an old friend, and it was based on an inside joke they had for several years.

“I wasn't even aware that he was wearing it until I got a phone call from his school complaining that Thomas was parading around school in an inappropriate shirt. It could have been worse though, because I went through the closet and one of the tees had an arrow pointing down saying lick my hairy balls.

Disclaimer: Stories printed in the Fanshawe Distorter are in fact fictious. Any resemblance to persons real or dead is intentional and entirely hilarious. Proudly distorting the truth since 2005