CREDIT: UNIVERSAL PICTURES
M. Night Shyamalan's, The Visit is a movie that lacks horror and thrill, the two themes on which it's said to be based on.

New from the mind of M. Night Shyamalan’s, The Visit is titled with the accuracy of Snakes on a Plane. The movie is, quite simply, about two kids going to visit their estranged grandparents. Some weird things happen and there is, of course, a twist, but the plot really is all in the title.

To start, there are issues with the cinematography style chosen by the director. If you had dreamt of days when found-footage-style horror movies were a thing of the past, prepare to be very disappointed.

Not only does this have the shaky cam and awkward narration we’ve all come to hate, but also features some of the most inexplicable camera placements and scenes possible. Prepare to spend half the movie wondering where you can get the magical batteries with infinite power these children have seem to found.

As bad as the filmography is, it can’t compete with the movie’s plot. Now, The Visit could have made a passable comedy, if done just a bit more over-the-top. It could also have made a decent thriller, if the pointless attempts at jumpscares were removed to make the entire film more menacing.

Instead, the movie tries to be a horror/thriller mix that just ends up failing at everything it attempts to do. The scary parts often come off as being hilarious and parts that are intended to be creepy just come across as weird or gross.

There’s also a large amount of ageism worked into the film. There are points where the children are genuinely feeling unsafe or uncomfortable and for the most part it’s just passed off as “Oh, all old people are just crazy”. A professional tip: if your grandmother is running around naked and attempting to scratch through doors, this is not normal old people behaviour.

Another problem is in the very premise of the movie. In what universe does any even somewhat decent mother send her kids off to stay with people she hasn’t seen in at least 15 years? You at least go for a coffee and make sure your kids are comfortable before abandoning them to go on a random cruise. This is really just common sense.

To be fair to the mother, however, these kids are pretty unlikeable. The daughter randomly uses pretentious and wordy language to show off how much smarter than her brother she is, which she makes sure to point out. The brother has issues with cultural appropriation and a random problem with germs that is pretty much thrown in and never properly addressed.

For all the many, many problems The Visit has, those few suspenseful scenes it has are really well-done. There are some more subtle disturbing moments that actually cause some concern for the characters.

Sadly, like every movie Shyamalan has written and directed since Signs, this is a movie full of wasted potential. Overall, The Visit is probably best enjoyed under the influence of The Booze.