President's Perspective: Is hitting part of the game?

When you are the oldest sibling, yet not old enough to drive, I am sure everyone was dragged along to many sporting events of their other siblings. For me, being the oldest of three brothers, there has been a lot of hockey, soccer and lacrosse. Which was fine, because there were always lots of other boys to look at. But all in all, I am a pretty big sports fan. I love going to the games, whether professional or for someone I know.

My now-22-year-old brother was the first of the three to get into competitive sports. He is a pretty aggressive player who enjoys getting into the fray, which was really exciting to watch. But once he turned 14, he and his teammates started body checking on the ice. And all of a sudden, going to the games wasn't so fun anymore. Being a strong player, he was constantly a target. And when kids are 14-years-old, they often do not know how to check properly, and frankly, some kids are just damn malicious. His problem was that he also had a temper, so he would not take any hits lying down. I am totally the “mom” in the crowd, who gets really upset when anyone hits her “baby,” and as a result I stopped going to games for a few years. Thank goodness he started to get more serious about doing better in his sports career around the time he turned 18. He now plays Division 1 hockey in the U.S. for his university and was recently drafted to Peterborough. So the games I get to watch him now are back to the way they used to be, where he was a strong player and just wanted to play.

I was hoping this was a one-time thing. But then my middle brother, who is 14 right now, decided to play competitive hockey, and we are back in the same situation as before. The kids are the same. Not all of them, but this time around, and maybe it comes with understanding the game a bit better and being a bit older, but I am noticing more kids hitting just because they are bigger than other kids. The biggest difference between my two brothers is that the younger one doesn't enjoy the fray as much. He just wants to play, doesn't want to hit, which in turn makes him less of a target. So I can breathe a bit easier this time around. But on top of the hitting, I am noticing a lot more of the younger players getting angry. They mouth off often at the refs about calls, or are banging their sticks against the glass, net or penalty box. And to me, it blows my mind. Guys keep telling me, “They are mad at themselves, It's all part of the game.” Correct me if I'm wrong, but the last time I checked, “banging your stick against the boards” is not a “part of the game.” Neither is mouthing off.

So where do we draw the line? Why do these kids at 14 have so much rage? I remember being 14 and getting upset about things, but I don't get why they are getting so angry. At 14, if I pulled a stunt like mouthing off at a ref, regardless of why, I would be scared to come off the ice, because my parents would be smacking some sense into me. But some parents cheer this on, and in turn, that makes kids think it's ok to act that way.

This may be a hard article to relate to, for anyone who doesn't have younger siblings, or doesn't get all emotionally attached to their family the way I do. So please, wish me luck, when my third brother (currently 11) is almost in those terror years. I am pretty sure he is going to enjoy the fray as well. So looks like since he is the last one, I only have to cover my eyes for a few more years.