Ask the Sex Doc: Low libidos make for lonely lovers

Dear Sex Doc;
I haven't dated for a couple of years because my past few dating experiences were horrendous. Well, I've just met this hot girl, got up the courage to ask her out and she said ‘yes.' I'm scared as hell. What are some first date tips?
Back on the Bike @ BCIT


Dear Back on the Bike @ BCIT;
There are definitely some things that you should and should not do on a first date. First of all, you should know what you are looking for in a date. You say she's hot, but is that the most important quality in a mate? I wonder how sexy she'll look at dinner if she picks her nose and eats it as an appetizer before the main course.

You should have some idea of the type of partner you are searching for, however, don't disqualify potential partners because they don't pass every test on your list. Sometimes people that we don't expect to connect with can surprise us.

On the day of the date don't forget to shit, shower, shave, and clean up. You don't want to smell like your bunghole or have spinach stuck in your pearly whites. You also want to dress appropriately for the location of your date. And Back on the Bike, in case you don't know, spandex is a definite no-no.

Act like yourself and don't pretend to be Rico Suave. You'll be more comfortable and more attractive to your date.

You also need to listen to your date's stories and definitely don't check out another hot chick while you're with her. If your eyes wander, you might wear her Pina Colada.

It doesn't sound like you have too many ex's, but under no circumstances should you bring up past conquests on the first date.

And Back on the Bike, if you end up going anywhere that serves alcohol you better not drink very much. You'll most likely dish out more than your fair share of embarrassing stories or end up pissing in your beer bottle cause you're too lazy to go to the pisser.

Take these dating tips to heart Back on the Bike. Who knows? She might be Mrs. Right.

Dear Sex Doc;
I'm completely baffled. My boyfriend never wants to have sex. I've tried everything including lingerie, striptease and sex toys. All of my friends think he's gay, but I really don't think so. What gives? Am I the only woman out there with a guy who doesn't like sex?
Horny, Need Sex @ UBCO


Dear Horny, Need Sex @ UBCO;
You're not the only woman out there with a guy who'd rather lay tile than lay pipe.

Your guy could be gay, but it is more likely that he has a low sex drive. Most women assume guys want sex 24/7, however, quite a few guys suffer from lack of sexual desire. A large American study by Laumann et al. (1999) found that 14 per cent of men had suffered from lowered sexual desire in the past year.

Horny, Need Sex that means that every seventh guy you meet doesn't have his sexual juices flowing. So, your guy is definitely not alone.

There could be a number of reasons your guy isn't interested in playing sex games with you. One possibility is that your guy is pulling his pud nonstop while you're at school. Check out his dick... if it's raw he'd rather spank it than you.

You never mentioned if you had sex like bunnies and he suddenly stopped or if he never attempted mounting you. Some guys always have low sex drives, while lust drops for others at different times in their lives.

This is obviously bothering you, so I would have a talk with your guy about how you are feeling. It is best not to judge him, place blame, or question his manhood.

Dr. Brian Parker is a clinical sexologist and sex educator and the co-creator of two sexual intimacy board games “Embrace” and “Pillow Talk.” The games are available on his website, www.foreverpleasure.com which features original erotic art, high-end sensual products and adult sex education.