Alt-right thrilled over closure of campus paper

A photo of an empty Interrobang rack. CREDIT: FSU PUBLICATIONS DEPARTMENT
Alt-right groups like Students Against Democracy are praising the Fanshawe Student Union (FSU) for its decision to shutter the Interrobang newspaper.

Alt-right groups are rejoicing following the announcement that the Fanshawe Student Union (FSU) plans to shut down operations of its campus newspaper, Interrobang.

“I just think right now, with fascism on the rise, it’s the perfect moment to tell students, ‘Hey, let’s get rid of the freedom of the press,’” said a member of the political group Students Against Democracy. “Really kind of does our job for us, you know? Thanks, FSU!”

One of Students Against Democracy’s main goals is to push more students towards accessing information from places like Twitter–sorry, X–as they feel it better represents their version of truth.

Navigator. Londons student lifestyles magazine.

 

“Traditional community news outlets that have to abide by things like ‘ethics’ and ‘integrity’ are just not really what we need right now,” said X user, @HeilElon69. “We want to make sure students are getting their information from the right places.”

Students Against Democracy has specifically praised how the FSU made its decision to cut the newspaper. As previously reported by CBC, CTV, and the Western Gazette, the decision to cancel Interrobang was made by the FSU’s Board of Directors during a series of closed meetings, without consultation of the broader student population.

“Unilateral decision-making that doesn’t call on the input of regular people is a very important part of our ideology,” said one member of the group. “It’s really great to see the FSU is on our side with this. We trust our supreme leaders, and we think all students should too.”

The group said it hopes this decision will lead to more voter apathy from students following what it called a “concerning” uptick in ballots cast in this year’s FSU Elections.

“We weren’t happy about the increase in students voting this year,” a spokesperson for the group said. “Our hope is that by keeping students in the dark about campus issues, they won’t be as likely to vote again next year. The last thing we need is a well-informed voting body.”

One of journalism’s main pillars is speaking truth to power. But supporters of Students Against Democracy allege this is an “outdated” idea.

“I just don’t see why we need to question people in power–they’re in power for a reason!” said X user @elon_is_my_king.

Interrobang has previously been recognized for its disability reporting and has also worked with the Black Students Association at Western University to create collaborative Black History Month issues. Its reporting has even led to changes on campus regarding student safety and academic integrity.

“Yeah, well…that’s DEI, so…” said Students Against Democracy confusingly in response. 

Ultimately, the move to cancel Interrobang is a win for the alt-right, according to Students Against Democracy.

“We just really want to send our appreciation to the Board for this,” the group said. “Thank you for making it harder for students to access the truth. It really couldn’t have come at a better time for us.”


Disclaimer: Stories printed in the Fanshawe Distorter are in fact fictious. Any resemblance to persons real or dead is intentional and entirely hilarious. Proudly distorting the truth since 2005.