If I had a time machine, I'd get my two hours back

Header image for Interrobang article CREDIT: PARAMOUNT PICTURES
Something chalk full of cliches ike Project Almanac could have audiences wanting to travel back in time to watch another movie.

Hidden in a secret compartment in a surprisingly clean basement lie the plans to a time machine, code named Project Almanac. Discovered by a group of smarter-than-average teenagers after they see something odd on an old video camera, the machine is constructed in the hopes of changing lives for the better.

However, teenagers being teenagers, things quickly go awry.

Starting with the little bit of positive this movie has, the acting is pretty good. Then again, any movie that brings up a consistent nervous tick once and then has the actor instantly forget about it can't be said to be great. There's also an issue with having an actor who clearly doesn't need glasses wear glasses. Johnny Weston — playing the main character David Raskin — creates a constant annoyance by never keeping his glasses on even when driving, which is probably illegal.

This is far from the most illegal thing that happens in the movie. On top of breaking into a school to steal the great amount of hydrogen it inexplicably has, they manage to buy tickets for — and subsequently win — the lottery even though the oldest is only 17. This is technically a spoiler, but it's also so obscenely cliché that it really doesn't count.

Speaking of clichés, Project Almanac either mentions or does every time-travel cliché possible, while strangely avoiding mentioning the one movie that is most relevant — The Butterfly Effect. They mention almost every other time-travel movie — even including a quick screen shot of Bill and Ted — and then explain the theoretical concept of the butterfly effect without using the words or mentioning the movie even once. It's almost a ridiculous omission that makes no sense after the breaking of the movie universe wall, which is the thing where every movie exists in a world with no other movies.

There are also a ton of plot holes that make Project Almanac even more unrealistic than your average time-travel, teen-romantic, sci-fi, drama movie. The pseudo-scientific explanations are mostly just people saying the names of random chemicals, with no link to logic or actual science, mixed with mumbled half-explanations about batteries. The film also — somewhat comically — mentions Doctor Who and then breaks the one big rule the Doctor has instead of including it in their random collection of arbitrary rules. Considering the amount of time-travel movies and shows mentioned, one would think that paradox would be high on the list of things to avoid.

By somehow managing to be the most cliché time-travel movie ever created, as well as the most poorly- researched and executed one, Project Almanac is a great disappointment. The movie relies heavily on jargon that the actors clearly don't understand, and only allows the men to present themselves as scientists and engineers, leaving the women to be nothing more than love interests and plot devices.

It's sad to see yet another movie that does nothing more than perpetuate stereotypes even when the opportunity to do and be more is so readily available.